Bullies, Insight, Ramblings, Thoughts, Tragedy

Find My Love…

Bully

It’s a word that is used often these days. It’s a powerful word. You hear it, read it or say it, and you likely cringe a little because of the image or feeling it invokes.

However, I know there are some people who hear the word and roll their eyes. They think it’s overused or say, “I was bullied, it happens to everyone.” Others say, “Eh, it helps you get tougher.”

The thing is, it does happen to many people, kids and adults alike. Every. Single. Day. That doesn’t make it right. What makes it worse, is that it seems there is a blind eye turned when it’s reported. No one wants to be “that” person, you know, the narc. And when it is reported, there seems to be this approach of holding hands and singing ‘Kumbaya’, and I’m sorry, that is a sorry solution. The only thing that seems to happen in that scenario is that the bully is empowered and the victim is left feeling powerless.

Me about 3 or 4 years old
Me: about 3 or 4 years old

As I kid, I was picked on, teased and put down. OftenBut, c’mon, who wasn’t in some fashion? It was crushing, and if I wanted to sit long enough to think about it, I can still recall how it felt. I remember hoping that, just once, I would fit in somewhere. Eventually I made wonderful friends. Some I still keep in touch with, and have grown apart from others, but all of those friends helped me become the person I am now. When you’re a kid, all you want is to fit in. Hell, as adults, isn’t that what we still want?

Fortunately, I can look back and wear the badge. Yeah, it happened to me, and I am tougher. I made it through, but some people aren’t so lucky. Whether it’s cyber, physical or emotional bullying, it’s painful and can cause real damage.

So why am I bringing this up in my blog today?

It’s simple. As a mom, I have tried to arm my kids with knowledge and I’ve tried to teach them compassion; to treat others with respect.

I look at kids and assume the best about them, assume their parents are instilling the same values. Yes, I realize we all have different values and morals, but I would like to think that the goal is the same: Kind, loving, smart, strong children. Right?

The thing about it is that some of those same kids, (you know the cute, popular and funny ones) are the ones who take food from other kids, who pass fake notes to embarrass classmates or who mock and tease for a laugh. So I am shocked when other parents don’t seem to care that their child IS that mean kid.

Is that a badge that is worn with honor? I don’t think so.

You might not know that October is National Bullying Prevention Month and it’s my hope that someday, all kids, teens and adults will be able to do whatever it is that makes them happy without fear of being bullied for it.

There are great sources of information at:

http://www.stopbullying.gov/what-is-bullying/

http://www.pacer.org/bullying/nbpm/

Thanks for reading and I’m hopping off my soapbox now. I really hope that if you were bullied, you leave a comment, however brief, to speak up and let others out there know they aren’t alone. Sometimes, just sharing that little bit with others can make a world of difference.

XO
~T

🙂 “Find My Love” by The Avett Brothers. OMG, this song, THIS song, just gets me choked up.

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